“Where do you see yourself in 5years time?” — is there a precise answer?

I was going to title this “THE BIG QUESTION” but I wasn’t sure it sounded interesting or catchy enough to get your attention. But I am glad you were willing to explore regardless.

A lot of things go on in this little mind of mine and today I discovered the importance of documenting. I am about to share something I wrote down some years ago, but what spurred or took me back to my archives?

Tonight I had a deep conversation with a young lady over the phone. During our conversation, we got to the “where do you see yourself in 5 years?” question. She had gone out earlier in the day and someone had asked her this question. This question spurred a chain of thoughts in my mind.

I think to an extent this question puts pressure on young people, especially when they want a precise (S.M.A.R.T) answer, not because I am lazy but because I am not capable of predicting the future. The first question that came to my mind was this; is every move a calculated move?

Now, I think people just get to a point where they can connect the dots looking back in life but I am yet to meet anyone who was very much certain that they would be where they are today, 5 years or 10 years ago and I will always refer to the Late Steve Jobs’ speech at Stanford University in 2005 (link:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hd_ptbiPoXM).

I am a party to having a mental picture of the lifestyle I want to live and knowing that I have to work to live that life but the precision of what exactly I would be doing or where exactly I would be, I have no power over and because of this I get uncomfortable and irritable when someone wants me to be precise when they ask me this question.

No man actually has control of time or what the future brings to them. Man can only hope for a better tomorrow while he toils because truly, Hope is what makes us human. Time and chance is a part of every mans success story. No man can accurately predict the chances that come their way. I think we all just have to be prepared and keep working on something valuable in the present, hoping it takes us to a better place in the nearest future — Preparation meeting opportunity.

At this point, I was taken back to something I wrote some years ago, about two extremes in life and maintaining a balance. I must have written this after reading “Focus” by Daniel Goleman and “Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg.

Basically, my point was that we have two extremes in life and you have to find a way to maintain a balance. Do not fall prey of picking a side. You should actually sit on the fence.

Who or what are the extremes? So there are those who focus so much, that is, those that pay attention to the tiniest details, consciously or unconsciously. They plan every little detail step-by-step. And then those who can hardly focus on a particular thing, they take life as it comes and let things flow naturally. Those who plan too hard may think they have it all figured out and expect 1+1 to always give 2 and when it does not give 2, the feel very disappointed. The other extreme tends to enjoy life and probably have no results because they do not plan or have a focus. Those who pay so much attention get things done while the other extreme never actually get things done but rather things just happen to them.

What am I actually driving at? Success and happiness!

You see, you can be happy and probably not successful when you’re on the side of those who hardly focus and then you can be successful and most likely not happy when you’re on the extreme of paying so much attention, why? Because every little detail may upset you, especially when things do not go your way.

Take for instance, you’re on a queue in a bank, say Gtbank and the person in front of you is taking too much time or the cashier is taking too much time and you’re probably getting late because you planned to spend just 5minutes in the banking hall. If you’re the paying so much attention type, you’d get upset and irritated, but for the one who hardly pays attention, his mind would probably wander around to something else more comforting like the air-conditioning system that cools him down or maybe background music at the bank or just something that catches his attention at the end of his mind wandering around. This is because he hardly lets anything take his attention for too long and he did not plan to spend 5minutes like the other guy so he just enjoys the moment while trying to achieve what he is in the bank for.

I actually believe these people do not know what disappointment is. They just live and enjoy the moment while the other extreme is under the pressure of achieving a certain result or being a certain someone in the nearest future when truly, they have no control over time or what the future brings and so when they do not have the results they have been working or planning towards, they slip away or even slide into a depressed state.

So this is my conclusion, to be happy and successful, you can’t be on any of these extremes, you have to be in between. Learn to consciously pay attention to “the important” things, the 80/20 principle — not everything matters, only a small portion matters and that’s most likely what you should focus more on. And then consciously think on the bigger picture (Learn to dream), let the mind wander at times (Explore), learn from your mistakes, think of where you want to see yourself in the nearest future(Have a mental picture)and let this keep resonating in your mind, the mind is powerful and happiness in the mind can translate into physical happiness.

Preparation meeting opportunity leads to success — “Time and chance happeneth to them all”

I hope we all agree on this. Think on it.

I would love to know what you think.